Adoption - how to make an important step?
Adoption is a very important and crucial step, on which not only the life of the adoptive parents will depend, but also the life of the child. That is why it is important to know in advance all the nuances, prepare and think through everything to the smallest detail.
How to make a decision?
If a married couple has long dreamed of adoption, then decided, in fact, no matter what. But there are other situations. For example, spouses have long dreamed of a child, but the long-awaited pregnancy never occurs. Yes, there are other ways to find happiness and become parents. But if an adoption option is being considered, then in this case some important points should be kept in mind. We list them:
- Remember that your life will change drastically. The appearance of a new family member will certainly change everything: marital relations, life, family life, lifestyle, principles and attitudes. Are you ready for this?
- Be prepared for difficulties. For example, there is a hereditary factor. And if the parents of the child had some mental problems, then it is likely to reflect on the baby. But problems will be in any case, be aware of this.The psychology of a child (especially left in an orphanage at a conscious age) is complex. He can withdraw into himself or defend himself from everything and everyone with rudeness and obstinacy. Find in advance a good specialist who can assist you in matters of upbringing and family relations.
- Maternal and fatherly feelings may not occur immediately (some are dulled), so do not worry that you do not feel an all-consuming love for the child. In a year or even earlier, you will realize that you simply cannot live without it.
- The opinion of others should not worry you. And even more so it can not influence your decision. So drop all the gossip, tips and tricks. Sometimes even the opinion of relatives has to be neglected. Their consent in this case is optional. This is your life, your decision.
- Listen only to your heart!
- Rate your capabilities. Can you take care of your child, give him affection, love and support?
- The material side of the issue is also important. Without permanent income, adoption will be impossible.
When you think about everything and weigh the pros and cons, make the final decision and begin to act.
Adoption of a child is a serious step, which must be legitimized. What is needed in order to become parents?
Here are the documents you need:
- Brief autobiography. Then you should write all the information about yourself. Specify the place of birth, tell us about your childhood, about your youth. Write where you studied, where you worked. Do not lie, because the information can be checked.
- To assess your financial position will require a certificate from the workplace, which must indicate your position and salary. And you can provide a copy of the income statement, it will also work. For one family member (including a child) there should be an amount equal to the subsistence minimum established in the region.
- Also certainly need a document confirming the ownership of the property. You can provide a copy of the financial account, as well as an extract from the apartment (or house) book. In any case, there must be a permanent place of residence.
- Need a certificate of no criminal record from the police.
- You must have a medical opinion of the municipal or state health care institution on the health status of the adopter (there should be no diseases that could interfere with parental responsibilities).
- If prospective parents are married, they must provide a copy of the marriage certificate.
- It is also necessary to provide copies of the passport and pension certificate.
- The guardianship authorities will draw up an act confirming the examination of the living conditions of the adoptive parents.
All listed documents are valid for one year from the date of their issue. A health certificate is given for three months (then it must be taken again).
After all documents have been submitted to the guardianship authorities, you need to wait 15 working days. After this period, the authorities will issue a conclusion on the possibility of becoming adoptive parents or a refusal (together with him will be given the procedure for appealing such a decision).
How to choose a child?
Of course, the child is not a pet, so choosing it is much more difficult. And to be honest, it's incredibly difficult! Entering the orphanage, you will see so many sad and clean children's eyes, full of the desire to find a family, that at first you will be in a state of confusion.And yet you have to make a choice, let it be difficult.
Here is the order of your actions:
- With a written conclusion about the possibility to become an adoptive parent issued by the guardianship authorities, you will have to go to the orphanage (you will also need to fill out a questionnaire, write wishes about the adopted child and a statement of intention to become foster parents). You do not need to go to an institution in your area; you can choose any other. In addition, you can contact the regional database of all children who have lost parental care. There you will be given information about children who can be adopted.
- Of the proposed children, you will need to select one or more, notifying the authorities. You will be given permission to visit.
- You will need to get to know the child, chat with him and make contact.
- You have the right to receive all the data about the child (so that the secret one does not become obvious and does not open up to you all of a sudden), and also conduct an independent medical examination.
- If you decide to adopt another child, notify the care authorities, you will be provided with information about other children.
Court of Justice
As soon as you make a choice, you will need to confirm the fact of adoption in court.
It is necessary to write a statement in which the following data is indicated: the name of the adoptive parents, their place of residence, the name of the adoptee, the date of his birth, information about his whereabouts and available relatives, circumstances that justify the request for adoption, as well as the request to change the name, place and date of birth of the child (if necessary). Also attached to the application are all those documents that were submitted to the guardianship bodies at the initial stage of adoption.
The court will make a decision. In the case of a positive response, it will be necessary to register the child at the new place of residence.
So, all the paperwork is behind, but there may be other problems:
- What to say to relatives? Say it like it is. By the way, there is such a thing as the secret of adoption. So if you want to hide this fact, you can do it. And the one who opens the secret, will have to pay a fine.
- Understand that you are now a family. Full value.
- If the child is not yet ready to call the new parents mom and dad, do not insist, give time.
- Communicate more with your child, it will help you get closer. Be interested in his experiences, spend more time together.
And let the adopted child become native.
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